Sunday, September 28, 2008

Redemption



The greatest news just reached my ears a couple minutes ago!
24 Season 7: Redemption!

NOVEMBER 23!!

YESSSS

Here's to not waiting till January! From what I've seen it looks very interesting. So once again, November is the month of epicness.

1) Switchfoot's new album "BEST YET" (4th)
2) Nerf Night (7th)
3) 24 (23rd)
4) Quantum of Solace (whenever that is)
5) Left 4 Dead (thank you kevin!)


Anyway, I'm totally excited for November!

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Ghost

Interviewing A Monster

Ghost

Subject: unnamed poltergeist

Interpreter: Dr. Charles Stern

Location: London, England

The staff on hand at The Institute of the Study of Disembodied Entities did everything they could to make me as comfortable as possible. For this reason, my current surroundings startle me. Dr. Stern escorted me into a small, white-walled chamber they refer to as "the freezer." He politely motions me to a seat and takes one across from me as his staff lock us in. His calm demeanor betrays the severity of the situation. Seconds after the door closed, the room became deathly chill. In fact, it was so cold that the one-way mirror built into the wall accumulated frost. We knew our disembodied friend had arrived.
The walls began to shake so violently it was as if the room were about to split open. The wails started after wards, performing the opening notes of a grizzly concerto completely composed of howling and screaming. The source of these disturbances made us aware of it's presence when my clipboard suddenly shot out of my hands and circumnavigated the room at a very high velocity. All this time, Dr. Stern retained his composure and stared at me curiously. At his word, the clip board slowly descended into my lap. The screams died down and were replaced with the low howling and whispers of "leave this place","abandon all hope", and "you are not welcome". At that, our interview began.

I deeply regret having you witness that, but in order to know a ghost, you must "experience" one. It is in the nature of a ghost to harass and berate. They are almost single minded in wanting to cause discomfort and harm. It's practically all they do. They are very selfish and possessive, believing no one else is worthy enough to live in the house they haunt or own the possession they protect.

The key thing to note regarding ghost is they have no real substance. They cannot physically stand in some one's way. This is the reason why they rely so heavily on these "scare tactics". They do not possess the means to change someone and steer them away, or even towards their haunted home for that matter. They try so very hard to keep people away from their homes even though they do not own them.

Studies have shown that some ghosts even invite people. This is debatable since the fashion in which they "invite" is so similar, if not exactly the same as the one they use to keep people away. For this reason, we have come to the conclusion that ghosts can only scare people away. It may not always be their intention, but that is all they are capable of.

The Poltergeist grows restless at this remark and beings to pound on the walls

As you can see, they are incapable of accepting the fact that their efforts are in vain. Another important fact to note regarding these apparitions is they cannot be reasoned with. They are terribly stubborn as evidenced by the incessant wailing and pounding. The fact that they are easily insulted goes without saying.

Dr. Stern raises his voice as the pounding gets louder.

Whatever the case may be, be cautious when dealing with a spectre. Some have a tendency to get violent. They are very irrational and unpredictable.

At this point in the interview, my pen flies from my hand and begins to gravitate around my face, thrusting literally millimeters from my retinas

Let's conclude our interview here then. Our unseen guest is obviously riled up.